6 Things You Should Look for in a Mentor
Hello everyone! Today’s post came from a very dear place in my heart, because today is the one year anniversary since Tricia and I know each other! On June 4th 2017, I met Tricia from @happilyeverstyle at Happy Bone cafe in Soho. That time, hardly did I know that this casual meet up will have such a huge impact of my life, because ever since then, she’s become one of my closest friends, my mentor - I called her “Jie”, an endearing term in Mandarin meaning “sister.” So today, I want to share 6 things you should look for in a mentor, and pay official tribute to my dear Jie/mentor - Tricia!
大家好！今天要來發一篇感性文，因為今天是我和Tricia認識的一週年紀念日！去年的六月四號我和她在紐約下城的一間小咖啡館第一次碰面，那時候我還真不知道從那天起我們會變成無話不說的超級好朋友，我每天都姐長姐短的叫她、有姐的感覺真的很棒呢！所以今天我要來分享六點我覺得Mentor(有點像是中文的「良師益友」)最重要的特質，請繼續往下詳讀！
They Inspire You 他們啟發你
I’ve always feel like the ability to inspire someone is the most precious thing about being an influencer. When any of you leaves me a message or DM me about questions on how I do something, or where I buy something, I feel like I am making a little impact on this world in my own way, and I cherish that feeling very much. Tricia inspires me in so many different ways, professionally and personally. She’s just such a warm, happy person that I have so much to look up too! Not to mention her organizing and decorating skill- my room does not look like this before I met her!
「影響力」大概是我覺得身為一個迷你部落客最迷人的一件事了。當你們留言問我問題，或者在IG上私訊我時，我都會覺得很高興，因為我覺得我以我小小的方式在影響這個世界。我有時候都會開玩笑稱呼Tricia是位「全方位的姐」，因為她真的全方位地啟發我！不管是專業或私人領域，我總在她身上學習到很多。尤其她真的很會整理和裝飾房間，我房間現在比較美麗也都是跟她偷學的呢！
They Accept You but Knows When to Push You 他們接受你的缺點，但也挑戰你成為更好的人
We all have that person in our life, someone that just can’t accept you for who you are. And that’s okay, because not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. A true mentor and a true friend understands and accepts your flaws and shortcomings, because she/he knows that just like everybody else, you’re not perfect, but you’re working on becoming better. They pushes you to be braver, and to step outside of your comfort zone.
我相信每個人生命中都有一些「賈不妙」，不管你再怎麼努力，對他們來說就是不夠好。我也曾經花很多精力在討好這些「賈不妙」，但這些年來我明白一個道理，覺得你不夠好的人，我們也覺得他們不夠好。一個真正的良師益友，接受你的缺點，因為他明白我們都是人，而我們不完美。但他也明白你可以更好，更出色，所以他們挑戰你，激勵你。
They Care About You As A Human Being 他們關心你
Some people think that mentor strictly falls into a professional development setting, but I think otherwise. Mentor for me is someone that doesn’t just care about your professional development, they also care about you as a human being. So many of my sentences to Tricia start like this: “Jie- Question, ” because I literally ask her opinions about everything! Careers, boys, what to wear tomorrow, which photo should I choose for Instagram, even what do I want to be when I grow up. Mentors know and care about you, and they will always look out for you.
有些人覺得良師益僅限於專業領域，而我不怎麼認同。對我來說，Mentor不僅關心你的專業發展，他們也關心你的個人生活。我很常每天姐長姐短的問Tricia一堆問題，從職涯發展，男子們的約會，課業，明天要穿什麼，照片po哪張比較好，問題種類之包羅萬象，而Tricia從來不會覺得煩，因為她不只希望我專業領域發展成功，她也希望我安定和快樂。
They Want To See You Succeed (And Won’t Get Jealous About It) 他們想要你成功（而且不會嫉妒你的成就）
This I believe is a hard one. I’ve heard so many stories about how some mentorships/friendships fell apart because one side of the party couldn’t handle the success of another one. Mentor is someone that always wants to see you succeed, and they are confident and self-assured in themselves’ own achievement that they will not get jealous towards you- they are happy for you.
這點我覺得滿難的。我聽過很多師友關係、朋友關係、甚至是男女的感情破局都是因為其中一方無法承受另外一方成功的壓力。我覺得一個真正的良師益友，是內心充滿安全感，且不會因為你的成就而受到威脅的，他們替你的成就感到高興！
They Enjoy Spending Time with You (And You Enjoy Spending Time With Them) 他們喜歡跟你相處（你也喜歡跟他們相處）
Mentoring just like friendships, it’s a two-way street. The amount of time and effort you put in them, ideally they put just as much in you. So one thing I believe that is most important thing you should look for in a mentor, is that you have to enjoy spending time with them. Tricia and I hang out so much- we don’t just go to events together, we grab coffee, we shoot photos, and we come over to each other’s place just to hangout, and we want to be there for each other through important moments of life! (Can you guys believe that she flew back from LA to NY just to attend my graduation? I KNOW RIGHT!)
良師益友的關係其實就跟友情一樣，是條雙向道。你對他們付出多少，理想上來說他們也會投以同等回報。所以我認為一段良師益友關係是否成功，在於你們喜不喜歡跟對方相處。我和Tricia除了會一起去參加活動外，我們還會沒事約喝咖啡、拍拍照、去對方家裡玩耍，她還特地從LA飛回來參加我的畢業典禮呢！酷吧！
They understand your industry/niche and are great sounding boards that we bounce ideas off 他們了解你的產業，討論想法的時候很容易
The world of blogging and instagramming can be lonely sometimes. Let’s be real, not many people really get why we take so much efforts in arranging our grids, editing our photos, or even location hunting for beautiful pictures. Having a mentor that understands your industry is very helpful because not only can we brainstorm creative ideas together, we can also bring those ideas into execution, and actually make it into a fun project! Like this anniversary shooting- Tricia in pastel pink(her signature color), and I in red! We’ve decided to make this into a tradition as we believe that friendsversary is just as important(if not more) as the wedding anniversary!
部落格和IG的世界有時候其實很寂寞。因為說實在的，沒有在經營的人其實很難理解為什麼我們要花那麼多的時候修照片、排照片、甚至是一大早出門去搶光或者搶景點。有一個跟你有同樣熱情、同樣領域的良師益友在這方面對我來說真的幫助很大，我們都會一起討論有趣的想法，然後真的去執行！像今天的週年紀念照，Tricia穿她的經典淺粉色，我穿我張揚的大紅色，就是我們有次喝咖啡討論後的結果呢！我們也決定要將這個變成一個傳統，因為我們認爲不只結婚週年、交往週年值得紀念，女生朋友的認識週年更值得紀念！
I can say with such great confidence that mentors were one of the biggest drivers behind my growth as a person- and life in New York without Tricia would have been so different if I haven’t met her one year ago. I am so grateful to her, so thank you, Tricia! And thank you guys for reading! Life is scary, find your mentor/Jie!
今天話很多，因為這篇文對我來說真是太發自內心了！如果沒有Tricia，我想我在紐約的日子應該會苦悶很多，所以特別謝謝她！我也謝謝你們認真讀完這篇文，有什麼想法都可以留言跟我說喔！
